Pointing out the obvious
Published 5:10 pm Tuesday, November 29, 2022
We all have them from time to time…those thoughts from deep within our minds.
From the obvious to the oblivious, those “Deep Thoughts” leave you, as well as those you share them with, scratching your head in disbelief….as in saying, “now why didn’t I think of that.
I share with you now a few “Deep Thoughts” – as passed along to me by a close friend as well as a few from a book – “Mountain Man Insights” – written by Henry Kranz (aka “Honest Henry”) and available for purchase by visiting www.mountainmaninsights.org.
I planted some bird seed. A bird came up. Now I don’t know what to feed it.
I had amnesia once – or twice.
I went to San Francisco . I found someone’s heart. Now what?
Protons have mass? I didn’t even know they were Catholic.
Speed carefully along the edge of a cliff.
All I ask is a chance to prove that money can’t make me happy.
If the world were a logical place, men would be the ones who ride horses sidesaddle.
What is a “free” gift? Aren’t all gifts free?
They told me I was gullible and I believed them.
Teach a child to be polite and courteous in the home and when he grows up he’ll never be able to merge his car onto the freeway.
God gave me two good hands, a smart mind, lots of love, and not much money.
Experience is the thing you have left when everything else is gone.
One nice thing about egotists: they don’t talk about other people.
D.C. builds a strong government, much like termites construct sound houses.
My weight is perfect for my height — which varies
I used to be indecisive. Now I’m not sure.
It takes a fool to follow a fool.
The cost of living hasn’t affected its popularity.
How can there be self-help “groups”?
The art of negotiating: give an inch, take a foot.
If swimming is so good for your figure, how do you explain whales?
The best place to see the hope of humankind is in children’s eyes.
Show me a man with both feet firmly on the ground and I’ll show you a man who can’t get his pants off.
Is it me or do buffalo wings taste like chicken?
It’s easier to grow tall children than to straighten out twisted grown-ups.
Global warming is melting my ice cream!
Most people follow the rules. Some people break the rules. A rare few make the new rules.
Do nothing now in order to conserve energy to do something later.
Heard on an “auto-receptionist” when calling a business: Thank you for calling. Your call is important to us. If you need immediate assistance, I am sorry that I no longer work here.
The package sells the product. The product sells the next one.
Some problems outwit their solutions.
It is easier to see what is wrong with a failure than with a success.
Man was created in a spiritual sense…then he discovered money.
Our ship is NOT sinking! The sea is rising around it.
Life’s breaking point is being over-extended and under-funded.
The rich are regular people with too much money.
The greater the disorganization, the more people it takes to get nothing done.
A politician checks himself into a hospital for an operation to make his mouth bigger. That way his foot can slip easily in and out.
I’m the man in charge. The woman who knows what we are doing is behind me.
Performance beats promises.
Best if used before now!
A good pen appreciates a good writer.
Everything you want to know, you can Google. Everything you need to do, you can download an app. So, why waste years of time in school?
The new program will provide confidential outreach and support to disturbed politicians who are experiencing a variety of behavioral problems, such as uncontrolled clinging to dogma, inability to perceive reality, money mania, power abuse, and situational stress.
Everything gets done in an eight day work week.
Cyber Security: Don’t click when you don’t know where it came from.
Bureaucracy turns inspiration into regulation.
Have the courage of your convictions…be powerfully wrong!
- What is life without chocolate?
- Plain vanilla.
Economists accurately forecast what happened yesterday.
When the world doesn’t work, we pass a law. When the law doesn’t work, we pass some more.
Healthcare debate: America has the world’s most costly sick people.
Despite our best efforts, we succeeded!
Drink up the whiskey before it all evaporates!
Some people have as much depth as a flat screen TV.
It’s rotten at the core, but the edges are still tasty.
Sometimes the fish is stronger than the fish hook.
I’m one check short of being broke.
Good health is the health care plan we can afford.
Politicians’ solutions become our problems.
Only fools play games without rules.
Life is subject to change without notice.
When there is no road, blaze a trail.
What is an imperfection or two, among friends?
Life is the challenge of seeing how many cars we can outlive.
We’ll all do quite well after America secedes from Washington, DC.
A mug and a hug make me happy!
Stay grounded when all the flying bubbles are bursting.
Due to the rapidly escalating cost of elections, we are switching to a cost-containment dictatorship.
And the last, and probably most important piece of advice: Tune out the noise….hear the music!
Cal Bryant is Editor of Roanoke-Chowan Publications. Contact him at firstname.lastname@example.org or at 252-332-7207.