Look out, the government goomers are back!

Published 9:33 am Thursday, March 3, 2016

George Orwell thought the world was going to heck in a hand-basket in his novel “1984”, which was a nightmare about the total loss of individual liberty in a state where “truth” changed to suit what the genial “Big Brother” had in mind that day.

The idea for the novel came from the brutal dictatorship of Stalinist Russia, which imprisoned tens of millions of people and murdered millions of others for simply doing what “The State” said they shouldn’t do, such as listen to American music or criticize a government official.

One of the most frightening things in Orwell’s novel, however, was a brutally oppressive regime that could punish you for your thoughts. A thought-crime in that bleak world would get you brainwashed, at best, or tortured and killed.

But the only way the authorities could discover if you were committing a thought-crime was to observe you closely and use sophisticated psychological techniques to get you to confess that your thoughts were aberrant, which, as near as I can figure, means that you don’t agree with everything The State says and does.

The United States and the Russians, we discovered a few years back, were engaged in something just as insidious for over 20 years – using psychics to gather intelligence information. That’s right, back in the ‘70s and ‘80s the CIA was going around the nation gathering up wild-haired, oddly-attired old women from small trailers situated off the main highways and asking them to spy on the enemy from their living rooms.

What nefarious plots did the deep cover agencies, which used to answer to no one elected to government office, do with these mind-invading psychics?

And you thought computers and smart phones were invading your privacy? That’s nothing. Worry about the government spying on smart phones and such is just misdirection. They want you to worry about computers so you won’t suspect that psychics are strolling through your head.

If they want your secret thoughts – all those bad things you imagine doing or saying or wish that would happen – they can get one of their psychics to gaze deeply into her crystal ball to find them out without you ever knowing there was someone traipsing about inside your skull.

The CIA says it dropped the program in the ‘90s because it said they only had a 15 percent success rate, but who believes the CIA?

Even if you do believe the CIA and the FBI, what you really have to worry about are all those other “Black Op” agencies that operate outside approved government channels.

You know the ones. They’re the groups in charge of such things as keeping it a secret that big-headed alien goomers have landed on Earth.

What did we learn from them little big-headed goomers when they crashed that spaceship in Roswell? I’m sure they communicate telepathically because they have itsy-bitsy mouths that are too small for talking and they don’t even have noses, so they must talk to one another through brain waves.

The secret government, the one that really runs things, has had a bunch of live aliens to examine since a flying saucer crashed in Roswell in 1947. By now the so-called “black agencies” have wrestled the secrets of ESP (extrasensory perception) out of those tiny little aliens who came to Earth with only the best of intentions.

Now, not only is the “secret government” out to get us, the aliens are, too.

The TV psychics and the little old women living in trailer parks have an insidious mission to complete: Secretly take control of a 100 million minds so they can enslave us all, and turn us all into unthinking zombies who believe everything we’re told.

Trump for president!


Keith Hoggard is a Staff Writer at Roanoke-Chowan Publications. He can be contacted at keith.hoggard@r-cnews.com or 252-332-7206.