Fourth and Long
As the New Year rolls around I am reminded that the time has come to make New Year’s resolutions. I could bore you with a dull list of things I plan to change in my own life, but I know you don’t really want to read that plus I have to save something to write about next week in my editorial column.
What I will do instead is create some resolutions for the people in and around the sports world. I doubt any of them will resolve to actually make such changes and reach such goals, however I think they and all of us would be better off if they gave it a shot.
Lebron James should resolve never to announce anything on ESPN…ever. It was bad enough people were ready to hate him if he decided to leave Cleveland. Still it was made much worse by the extra hate he received after announcing that he was taking his ego to South Beach in a 30-minute special on ESPN.
ESPN should resolve to be in the sports news reporting business and not in the sports news making business. There is nothing more ridiculous than someone on ESPN complaining about all the coverage something that they deemed as unimportant is getting. By discussing it on the world’s largest sports network they are making it news.
Tiger Woods should resolve to play more golf. There were many out there that thought that Tiger may never get over all the controversy surrounding his life during the last year however it seems the more he golfs the more reporters talk to him about golf and not his drama.
Greg Oden, George Hill, Martellus Bennett and Brett Favre should resolve to keep their pants on. No…they are not in a hurry. They allegedly all took their clothes off and posed for pictures that got leaked. Seriously fellas…I know your all in great shape, but nobody wants to see that.
Ryan Miller should resolve to trip Sydney Crosby every time he can reach him on the ice. The Buffalo Sabres goalie played the game of his life against Canada in the Olympic gold medal match. It was not to be, howeve,r for the USA goalie as Crosby scored a golden goal in overtime to win it for Canada. Miller was a beast throughout the tournament and was this (spread your thumb and pointing finger about 1 millimeter apart) far from bringing home the gold. Stupid Canadians eh’!
Reggie Bush should resolve not to propose to anyone. Bush was dating one of the hottest women on the planet when he announced to everyone that should his New Orleans Saints’ hoist the trophy he would propose to Kim Kardashian. As it turns out he and the Saints did manage to win it all and shortly there after his relationship with one of the hottest women on the planet was over. Apparently she wasn’t ready for a long term contract and was interested in taking her talents to South Beach. Sound familiar?
David Friedman is a long-time contributor to the Roanoke-Chowan News Herald. A Bertie High School graduate, he and his wife currently reside in Wilmington. David can be reached via e-mail at firstname.lastname@example.org.