Published 12:00 am Friday, January 12, 2007
OK, I’ve heard more than I can take.
If I hear Donald Trump or Rosie O’Donnell say one more thing about each other I’ll throw my television out the window. And if you haven’t heard anything about this latest celebrity squabble you’re lucky.
But let me fill you in.
It’s an argument worthy of a kindergarten playground.
**Insert photo of Donald and Rosie peacefully playing in one sandbox.**
It all started when Rosie blasted The Donald on “The View” for forgiving Miss America Tara Conner for her partying ways.
**Insert photo of Donald picking Tara to play on his kick ball team instead of Rosie.**
Rosie basically said he was not the greatest role model for 20-year-olds in the United States since he had been divorced a few times and had filed for bankruptcy. She then flipped her hair over to one side, mocking Donald’s famous coif.
**Insert photo of Rosie pushing Donald off the ladder to the monkey bars.**
It must have hit a nerve with Donald because it was all down hill after that.
The next day Donald was on every show calling Rosie a “fat loser,” “a fat pig” and that if he had a chance he’d “look her in her fat face and tell her ‘You’re fired’!”
Oh yeah, she definitely hit a nerve. Apparently a big fat one.
**Insert photo of an audience starting to crowd around the scuffle.**
Donald also mentioned he had never filed for bankruptcy and Rosie’s boss, Barbara Walters, never wanted to hire the comedienne in the first place.
**Insert photo of Donald pushing Rosie back and sticking out his tongue.**
Rosie’s response was a shrug and a sarcastic face. Then Rosie went on vacation with her family.
**Insert photo of Rosie in the corner.**
Of course this brought Barbara into the whole charade. She fired back at Trump the next day, saying that though he had never filed for personal bankruptcy, a few of his casinos had and she never regretted bringing Rosie onto the show.
**Insert photo of Barbara wagging her finger at Donald.**
Donald didn’t let the issue drop. He worked the media circus, not only about the whole Rosie deal, but his upcoming season of “The Apprentice” as well.
His daughter, Ivanka, and his wife, Melania, also made comments on the dispute calling Rosie a “bully” and “mean.”
**Insert photo of Donald, Ivanka and Melania taunting a red face Rosie in the corner.**
Then Rosie came back from her vacation and shot back by saying The Donald was “obsessed with her.”
**Insert photo of Donald secretly writing “Rosie + Donald = 4 ever” over and over again in his notebook.**
A report of a backstage spat on “The View” between Rosie and Barbara was circulated throughout the press. Rosie reportedly shouted at Barbara when she tried to welcome Rosie back.
**Insert photo of Rosie and Barbara brawling in the lunch room.**
Donald then sent Rosie a letter in which he said Barbara had lied to both he and Rosie.
**Insert letter: To Rosie, I hate you, but it’s all Barbara’s fault. She’s a liar. From, The Donald.**
Rosie and Barbara must have got over their tiff because they were supportive of each other the next day on “The View.” Barbara called Donald pathetic and Rosie gave her a high five.
**Insert photo of Rosie and Barbara with their arms around each other wearing matching t-shirts reading, “Boys Are Losers and They Stink Too!”**
Donald didn’t let the comments go pass as he issued a statement to the media, saying both Rosie and Barbara were liars. He called Barbara a “sad figurehead” who lets herself be bossed around by a “third rate comedienne.”
**Insert photo of Donald knocking over Rosie’s
and Barbara’s tower of blocks.**
So, is it the end of the feud between Rosie and Donald? Who knows and no one should really care. But just a guess, it will probably go on until they’ve at least graduated high school.